Laugh, It's Funny
  • “John McCain, by gosh, did you know this? He was on ‘The View’ earlier today. Yup. And I thought to myself, well good Lord, hasn’t this man endured enough torture?” –David Letterman
  • “If you watched TV last night, you know Charlie Gibson did something John McCain has never done, interviewed Sarah Palin. No, last night, Sarah Palin gave a interview with ABC’s Charles Gibson. And earlier today, her future son-in-law was on ‘Maury Povich.’ ‘You are the father!’” –Jay Leno
  • “The Secret Service revealed that Sarah’s husband, Todd, who works in the oil field, his codename is ‘Driller.’ I guess they figured Bill Clinton wasn’t using it anymore.” –Jay Leno
  • Referring to Palin’s hunting skills, Merlin Patton said, “We might have to bring the meat she kills up in Alaska to feed us until we get some money.”